how I got here

I've never been the prettiest girl around, never been the most intelegent or the most talented. I was always (and still am till I get to know people) the quiet and shy one which always made me an easy target. All the way through my school life right up into adulthod I was the target of many bulies. I got the ocasinal physical abuse of my peers, but maostly it was verbal, the kind that over time sinks into your head, heart, and soul and that eventually you start to believe all the negative things being said about you. But being the stubbrn bitch that I am for all I belived what they were calling me and saying about me, for all I thought I deserved it. I never let it change me in the way of me being there for people when they needed someone. I guess being there for others was my way of cping with my own pain and hurt. Helping others took my mind off what I was thinking and feeling and gave me something to concentrate on. As well as doing that my other means of escape was writing. I would write everything from silly little poems, to song lyrics, to mini stories. basically anything and everything. Then oneday I was on one of the many social sites now out there and saw a group of people I had seen on tv and they were trying to start up a little mini business of their own. So being the giver that I am I along with god knows hw many others voluntered to help in any way I could. Little did I know that doing that would change my life the way it did. They had so many vlunteers they split us up into little groups and made little compititions out of the ways we helped them, which made helping them a lot more fun. I did my usual sit quiet unless needed thing in the group I was put in but I noticed a few in the group were having problems understanding things or doing thing and the girl who was suposed to be the leader of our little group was doing nothing to help them.... so I stepped forward and did what I could to help them understand whatever it was they were having dificulties with. I also ended up offering my ear to thse who needed it on a personal level as well, eventaully it wasn't just girls from my group I was helping but other grups as well. A few months into it I was contacted by one of the people who were trying to get the business up and running telling me that they had several girls from different groups (not just my own) all thought that I hould be a group leader because I was always there when they needed someone and I was asked would I be ok with that. I said ok and for all I was suposed to be the leader of the group it was more a joint thing. If anything it kind of ran it's self and it did so smoothly so I just let it roll the way it was. Thanks to that experience I made a group of good friends from all over the world but there were several that stood out above the rest. One was the wife of one of the guys wh were starting the business, she is now his ex wife and in my eyes better off without him if he is to stupid to see how special she is. She along with a coupld of others after reading some of the things I wrote for the group encouraged me with my writing, gave me the courage to make it more public rather than keeping it locked away where only my eyes could see it. I eventually made a little blog up and wuld post things and all the comments I got (Even the negative ones) helped to boost me even mre and encourage me to write bigger and better things but that isn't how I ended up here. It's how I got the courage to come into rp but not where the idea came from. Like I said we were from all over the world and we all had twitter accounts and kept in touch on there. Then one day we decided to be a little silly. We were all following a couple of the Sam Merlotte rp's on twitter and we decided as seem as we couldnt all go for real life drinks together we would go for vertual ones. We would meet up at a certain time and tweet the Sams, not all of them would reply but one of them always did and he quickly became the one we all tweeted our virtual drinks order to. He played the part perfectly and was almost identical to the character on the show Trueblood. One day I was having a laugh with him pretending to be sat in the bar and trying to catch him out with a drink that he wouldn't know how to make when a girl I had known almost all my life tweeted me asking me did I know that wasn't the real Sam Merlottle. I laughed and told her I shoudl hope not considering Sam Merlottle was a fictional character. She then said it wasn't the actor and I told her I already knew that. The Sam in question by this point had become someone I called a friend we would chat in private messages now and again abut real life. He saw what was being said to me and how quickly this girl telling me I was stupid and that I should grow up and stop talking to fakers was starting to take the happy happy I had going on away so he and another who I had been chatting to in the bar (a Remmy) both set me private messages asking if I had ever thought of joining rp. I said no as wouldn't be able to mimik a character like they could so they said well make one up and just to go chat with them like I already was. So I took the plunge and did so. Sam and Remy linked my girl out and she quickly got a lot wanting to follow her but not many wanting to talk to a new rper. One of the Alcides even decided to try and test my rp skills by trying to make me drop character while talking to him and when I didn't I quickly earned his respect along with a few others and the rest as they say is history... Not sure why I felt the need to write this or even share it but for some reason I did. I think it was because I want to both thank and at the same time make everyone awear of the three real life girls who always had my back and who suported me all the way and who still give me strength when I go to them in need of a boost and also thank My Sammy Boy (as I always called Sam) and Remy (Who I know will never see this as he wouldn't come to fb if you paid him to) because without them five I wouldn't be here in rp today.